So, I kind of hit a wall with the diet.
I did well through Thursday, but I took a break this weekend. I still tried to eat relatively healthy for the most part, but we ate out a few times, and I made cookies, etc.
My mindset was such, that I was starting to feel kind of down, I even cried on Thursday. I just felt like the diet was changing my life in ways that weren't intended. I was feeling on the outside of things that were happening. I was feeling deprived I guess. I don't think that's really the way we're supposed to feel.
Anyway, I decided to take a break for the ENTIRE weekend. And it was SOOOOOO nice. I still tried to make lots of healthy choices, but I didn't really restrict myself. And I think this mindset made all the difference. I really don't even feel bad that I took a hiatus. I think I knew I really needed it for my psyche, or morale, so in effect . . . it was just the therapy I needed.
I got my fill however, and decided that when Monday came around (today), that I would just go back to the diet for the week, and then allow myself a day of freedom from it on the weekend. I don't feel nearly as restricted now. And I feel so much happier.
I agree with Taryn's last post -- totally.
The things I observed during this hiatus, made me excited to start the diet again, feeling like maybe I could embrace it a little better. I became more conscious of the fact that my body feels better eating healthy things, rather than "fun" things. I needed to be totally CONSCIOUS of that fact. I am looking forward to feeling better again. I'm kind of having a "sugar hangover" today, I think. Not feeling my best.
So, I guess you could say, I'm tweaking things . . . trying to find a happy medium. Gotta have a healthy mindset behind this, or it won't work for me. I think my splurging helped me get to that point, in a weird way. The pendulum was swinging so far to one side with the diet, that I just had to swing it just as hard in the other direction . . . and hopefully I will find that pendulum resting somewhere in the middle. I'm sure it will take time to work out the kinks, but I definitely feel more in tune with my body, and that is a wonderful feeling. It's helping me feel like I will finally be able to find something sustainable for me, in the arena of diet and nutrition.
So, I don't know if I can really consider myself still taking the 30 day challenge at this point. But I feel like the challenge has taught me to eat better, and be more conscious of how eating better, makes me feel. I will still use her plan for the most part . . . her meals, the water consumption, exercise . . . but I don't know that I will be so rigid on the carbs, etc. We'll see. I will try, but if I start to feel depressed again . . . I'm grabbing a roll. ;)
Maybe over time, I will just find it easier and easier to eat as close to paleo as possible. So the 30 days is a teaching period, I think . . . but for me, it will probably take a year of eating this way to really change my body. And that's ok. I'm totally fine with that. And that is the very reason why I feel like I need to figure out how to tweak things to make it sustainable longterm.
I really like Sarie's proposal, and look forward to continuing forward in this endeavor with all my amazing sisters. Love having you to vent to, and get ideas from, and I love seeing how alike we all are. I'm glad we've all come to similar conclusions . . . it helps me feel more validated in my feelings and choices. Love you all!